Every year, at this time in the summer, I get an influx of parents who are D-O-N-E with the sibling conflict.

Summer is the Olympics of kids fighting.

3 Tips for Sibling Conflict:

#1) Remember that conflict is an essential part of life.

Every human relationship has conflict. There’s no escaping conflict.

Learning how to fight fair and argue is an important life skill.

Learning that family members have conflict AND still love each other is a message many of us didn’t grow up with.

Safety concerns aside, it’s ultimately good your kids are arguing – and it still can be annoying, difficult, and potentially triggering as a parent.

For parents of only children, I recommend setting up as many play dates as possible so your children gain these conflict resolution skills.

#2) Put your kids in the same boat.

You do NOT have to decide which one of your children is right or wrong, and you don’t have to be the enforcer of punishments.

THIS IS NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A PARENT – and usually worsens sibling conflict.

Playing “cop” (dolling out infractions/ consequences) or “judge” (deciding who is right or wrong) simply makes matters worse and intensifies sibling conflict and rivalry.

What to do instead?

Put your children in the “same boat.”

Parents have had amazing success with this Positive Discipline tool.

#3) “Attention is a poor substitute for Connection.”

Do you think your children are getting into arguments to get your attention?

If so, this tool is for you…

Prevent the development of a false sense of power by focusing on CONNECTION with Quality Time.

Sometimes, parents feel like they don’t have time for Quality Time. But, remember you’re going to put the time in with your kids in a positive way or in a negative – you get to choose which one it is!

You can pick the investment of Quality Time, which will positively grow your children’s brains and possibly prevent or minimize sibling conflict.

Or you can continue putting the time in with your kids with yelling, breaking up fights and punishing them….

If you think your kids are in a negative-attention seeking fighting cycle, remember the power of connection.

Which tip is relevant to sibling conflict in your family?